“In the case of most actresses, the beautiful dress is wearing them; not so with Lupita.”
Imagine that you are Jonah Hill. You just lost a ton of weight, changing yourself for the healthier and looking like a completely different human. A big deal! You’re not the funny fat guy anymore. You’re a whole new Jonah Hill. And at the same time you finish this crazy weight loss, you have to promote your new movie with Brad Pitt. Which means posing for photos next to Brad Pitt, who has aged from hot into hotter, looking more and more like the sun. You have to kind of look away from him. And you, Jonah Hill, have to stand next to this glowing perfection of manliness, looking for all the world like a vaguely sickly version of yourself, while the cameras flash on Brad and everyone asks about Brad and you are comparatively Jan Brady forever.
But, really, it’s sort of funny to think about. Imagine being in the midst of a major transformation of your life, and you expect plaudits and celebration, and instead… you’re next to Brad Pitt.
FOREVER TRUE, with or without the lbs. (but replace Brad Pitt with endless mentions of Leo, Marty, and fake humility).
Dating Jared Leto →
There was a point in time where Jared Leto was dating a whole slew of twenty something actresses, and it made no sense. He was in his has-been phase, or he was pursuing his band or whatever (and they are inexplicably big, I believe). But seeing him squiring the likes of Scarlett Johansson…
STILL TRUE. To use, um, Twilight parlance, this man has basically imprinted on a whole generation of women. It’s crazy. And he’s going to win an Oscar tonight! Did you ever think it’d be Oscar winner Jared Leto?